“A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds.” Proverbs 31:10 (MSG)
Honestly, before I got married I read these verses in Proverbs with such hope of the awesome wife I would be some day. Getting up before dawn and smiling at the future seemed like things that I would eagerly do for my husband. Of course I would. He would be the man I loved, and I would be willing to do anything to be the perfect wife.
…Then I got married.
Do I love my husband? Yes, of course I do, but I am also human. When that alarm goes off at 5:30 AM, I get a little selfish. I would much rather stay in the bed. So, these verses became just another checklist of, to borrow a term from Joyce Meyer, Suzie Super Christian that I was never going to get right. I felt like I would never get the whole concept of speaking worthwhile things to my husband. The truth is that my mouth just opens and things fall out without a single thought. And, I honestly had no idea where in my schedule I was going to fit in knitting. But, funny thing now, I crochet. :)
So, these verses quickly became chains that weighed me down. Every time I read it I added more and more links of thoughts that said, “I’m not good enough!” My heart was screaming it at me. That was compounded by the spotlight that people put on their awesome marriages on social media. I thought that we were the only ones that were not always happy. I thought something was wrong with me as a wife. I couldn’t get those Proverbs 31 items checked off my list every day. But, lucky for us, this isn’t a checklist. Holding on to that thought has broken off some of those “can’t measure up” chains. Truthfully, not all of them are gone because I’m still a work in progress. But I’m learning to believe that this is a promise of who I am, not who I should be. And, comparing my marriage, that I’m in every day all day, to marriages that I only see the highlights of on Facebook, isn’t fair to me or my husband.
Verse 30 helps to clear things up some. It says, basically, that these earthly things will fade away, but when a woman fears and reveres the LORD, then she is to be praised. Then, she has worth that far exceeds rubies and diamonds.
My daughter does a funny thing. She carries around this tiny purse and fills it with her valuables. Today that just happens to be a hair bow and a small key chain flashlight. The girl loves lights. But, the thing is, that to anyone else these things are of little to no value. However, to Dottie, they are worth the whole world. If you don't believe me, just try and take them away from her. Value of something is in the eye of the owner. We sometimes miss the value in ourselves that God our creator and Lord sees every day.
So, sweet sister friend, we don’t have to do all of those things in Proverbs 31 to be worth something to God. He says that by humbly being ourselves before Him, we already are worth something. We were worth everything to Him. We were worth enough that He sent His own son, a part of who He is to suffer and die that we could have eternal life. We were worth enough to Him that He created us. He didn’t have to do that. So, you see girl, you have worth and value. This world would not be the same without you in it. And, since you have value in this world, you have influence in it as well.
Honestly, before I got married I read these verses in Proverbs with such hope of the awesome wife I would be some day. Getting up before dawn and smiling at the future seemed like things that I would eagerly do for my husband. Of course I would. He would be the man I loved, and I would be willing to do anything to be the perfect wife.
…Then I got married.
Do I love my husband? Yes, of course I do, but I am also human. When that alarm goes off at 5:30 AM, I get a little selfish. I would much rather stay in the bed. So, these verses became just another checklist of, to borrow a term from Joyce Meyer, Suzie Super Christian that I was never going to get right. I felt like I would never get the whole concept of speaking worthwhile things to my husband. The truth is that my mouth just opens and things fall out without a single thought. And, I honestly had no idea where in my schedule I was going to fit in knitting. But, funny thing now, I crochet. :)
So, these verses quickly became chains that weighed me down. Every time I read it I added more and more links of thoughts that said, “I’m not good enough!” My heart was screaming it at me. That was compounded by the spotlight that people put on their awesome marriages on social media. I thought that we were the only ones that were not always happy. I thought something was wrong with me as a wife. I couldn’t get those Proverbs 31 items checked off my list every day. But, lucky for us, this isn’t a checklist. Holding on to that thought has broken off some of those “can’t measure up” chains. Truthfully, not all of them are gone because I’m still a work in progress. But I’m learning to believe that this is a promise of who I am, not who I should be. And, comparing my marriage, that I’m in every day all day, to marriages that I only see the highlights of on Facebook, isn’t fair to me or my husband.
Verse 30 helps to clear things up some. It says, basically, that these earthly things will fade away, but when a woman fears and reveres the LORD, then she is to be praised. Then, she has worth that far exceeds rubies and diamonds.
My daughter does a funny thing. She carries around this tiny purse and fills it with her valuables. Today that just happens to be a hair bow and a small key chain flashlight. The girl loves lights. But, the thing is, that to anyone else these things are of little to no value. However, to Dottie, they are worth the whole world. If you don't believe me, just try and take them away from her. Value of something is in the eye of the owner. We sometimes miss the value in ourselves that God our creator and Lord sees every day.
So, sweet sister friend, we don’t have to do all of those things in Proverbs 31 to be worth something to God. He says that by humbly being ourselves before Him, we already are worth something. We were worth everything to Him. We were worth enough that He sent His own son, a part of who He is to suffer and die that we could have eternal life. We were worth enough to Him that He created us. He didn’t have to do that. So, you see girl, you have worth and value. This world would not be the same without you in it. And, since you have value in this world, you have influence in it as well.
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